What about the van?
What about that engineering thing you were doing?
What about the Million Dollar Mountain?
These are all fair questions. And they wouldn't be questions if I was making better use of my time the past four months I've been home since completing the Pacific Crest Trail.
I feel like I'm at a put up or shut up moment, under no pressure from anyone but myself.
To be fair, I am making progress. Two months ago when I started working again I had less than no money. These days I'm bringing in about $3,500 a month as a car salesman. It's a commission job though, so it could easily be higher or lower this time next month, or the month after that.
The van needs more money, and so does my life. With each paycheck, most goes to bills and the rest goes to the items on my life check list that moves me closer to a completed van and an incorporated business.
One paycheck I'm thinking about the $135 I need to pay to legally change my name, and the $80 I need to buy Microsoft Office. Another paycheck I'm thinking about the $200 electric water heater and $200 water tank I need for the van.
But weeks go by in the mean time.
Oh yeah, I've also been thinking about things like "if I'm going to have a job at a fixed location I might as well get a cheap car to save miles on the van". This too, I assure you, costs money I don't have.
Previously I mentioned this whole journey to the top of this mountain is art. And it is.
But at some point, if only to convince myself, I need to make the progress measurable. I feel like I'm underperforming.
Selling cars takes up atleast 50 hours a week, virtually consuming the usable hours of Monday and Thursday. But I do get off at 6 on Fridays and Saturdays. To this point though I've spent the time on those nights socially.
On Tuesdays I work til 7. With the time I have left I have either been working on the van, or "wasting" by doing something non-van or business related (like making 60 second videos about how the math symbol "pi" needs to change to 6.28).
These aren't excuses, just an explanation you didn't ask for (aka an excuse).
I'm thinking a way to really tighten up the ship is to make daily posts, notes about the progress or completed tasks, if for no other reason than it will force me to want to put out something worth reading on the internet, as part of this story.
I need to be more focused if this is really going to happen (and it will).
I guess we'll see what that means tomorrow.